How To Handle Unwanted Advice During Pregnancy?
Having a new baby raises some concern from your part, changing diapers, giving the baby a bath and just about everything that is needed to be done to raise your baby. Not being an expert in changing diapers does not mean that you are a bad mother, however, if someone drops a hint that you are, the best thing that you can do is ignore the “advice” of the experts. There are several ways that you can stop all those unsolicited advice from friends, family or even from total strangers.
How do I persuade people to stop interfering?
You should remember that there is no other expert when it comes to your child than you. Some people may give you pieces of advice and some may even come across as criticisms about the way you are caring for your child. Take a good look at your happy and healthy baby this should be enough of a reminder that you are doing a good job. Believe in yourself and believe that you know your baby well enough.
Listening to some of the ideas being given to you by people around you may have some merit. Having confidence in your motherhood skills would help you sift and separate the useful information from the not so helpful ones. Should you find an idea interesting, you can tell the person that you find the suggestion helpful and maybe you can discuss it with that person. This would stop others from pitching in their ideas, especially if you don’t find them applicable to you or your baby.
One other common trick that you can do to stop people from interfering with you and your baby is by pretending to listen and nodding your head. Once the people around you notice that you are not really paying any attention, chances are, they would stop from giving you their ideas and suggestions.
The in-laws acting that they seem to know how to raise your child better than you is a totally different matter. Take the first step by talking to your spouse about it. Tell your partner that you feel uncomfortable about the constant reminders, suggestions and criticisms that his or her parents are throwing your way. Ask for your spouse’s help in trying to keep the suggestions to a minimum. If after your spouse talks to the his parents and the unsolicited advice still keeps coming, you can try to politely tell your in-laws that you are thankful for all their help, that you remember them and that there is no constant need to remind you of them. And if after you tell your in-laws about how you feel and it still does not stop, you can try to avoid going to your in-laws often or pass the blame to your spouse every time a suggestion or criticism comes along. This will help your spouse to realize that the criticisms and suggestions are meant for both of you since you are both the parents of the child.
